I have cancer... had cancer... You know I still don't know how to say it. Isn't it something you technically always "have" even if you're in remission? Who knows... but since I have to go for yearly check ups and will always and forever have to check "yes" to the C word when filling out medical paperwork... it's something that will always be with me no matter what. I had just turned 26 when I was diagnosed with Metastatic Papillary Thyroid cancer... basically meaning it had spread to the surrounding lymph nodes in my neck. I was a whole ten years older than this sweet girl is right now and was diagnosed with a cancer that was far less scary than what she was diagnosed with today... so I do not even begin to compare our situations or even say to her "I understand what you're going through", because I do not. But what I DO know... is staying positive is part of the cure. The doctors may not write a script for it nor do they make it part of the treatment plan but they should... in fact... is there someone I can write a letter to about that? What I'm saying is... half the battle is being in control of where your heart and your mind go... and laughter... I can't say enough about what kinds of things laughter can cure. I remember sitting in one of the MANY waiting rooms I had to sit in during my treatment... it was a tiny cold room where patients waited in their gowns to be called in for their chest x-ray or CT scan. At that time it was me and one other woman... she was sitting across from me and I had noticed her shoes... I was about to comment on how comfortable they looked when Tom Hanks' voice in Forrest Gump went through my head when he said... "Those look like comfortable shoes..." I literally had to put my face in my hands to hide the huge smile that came across my face preempting the bellowing laughter that wanted to escape me. Thank GOODNESS she was called immediately after that moment and when she left I literally let that laughter out as I sat there all by myself. Ahh... That... felt... good. I couldn't wait to tell my sister, who was out in the comfy waiting room waiting for me... we walked down the hallway of this cancer hospital laughing our hearts out. For a moment I thought... what if this is inappropriate? But then I saw patient in a wheelchair with her head wrapped in a scarf... staring at us... with the biggest smile on her face. Our laughter was contagious.
I'm not quite sure who I'm saying all of this too... She doesn't read my blog. I guess I'm sending my positive energy out into the universe for her. This is only the beginning and the road will be long and it will be hard. But I know she will get through it... and I can't help but be glad that she has a boy who is already so much of a man like my nephew by her side.